Sultry Body Care: My Favorite Lube, Massage, CBD, Pheromones & More!

Pairing potions and lotions with your gadgets and gizmos galore

Whether you’re drizzling on dildos or lapping lube off a partner, you deserve to know the sexual wellness and body care products I’ve:

• Actually used
• Continue(d) to use over time
• Would buy again

This mega-guide includes lubes, lotions, arousal gels, pheromone perfumes, condoms, massage creams, menstrual cups, and more.

I’ve been gifted many, but only a handful have stood the test of time — I’ll be clear on what’s to love about them. I’ll also include some options that aren’t for me but you might adore, since your situation and mileage may vary.

Keep it simple, or get luxuriously lascivious. Either way, I hope this list levels up your self-care and partner play.

Take your time with the table of contents, because there’s a loooot of ground to cover here.

Personal Lubricant

As an avid toy collector, it’s important to me that my primary everyday lube gets along well with:

• My silicone sex toys — I don’t use pure silicone lube formulas super often, as they can degrade solid silicone surfaces.
• My vaginal microbiome — I limit the internal use of hyperosmotic ingredients like glycerin/glycerol, and propylene glycol
• Any condoms used between my partner and me — I give my partner a heads-up about when a product might increase the risk of condom breakage.

Safety-wise, a water-based lube is the way to maximize compatibility for just about any application. Hybrid lubes are an unsung hero in my household — mostly water, but with small amounts of silicone for long-lasting lubrication. And I find it hot that they look like cum.

Basic Water-Based Lube

As far as minimalist water-based lube formulas go, Sliquid and Good Clean Love are among my favorites and have been suuuuper skin-friendly for me. Their formulations are balanced in pH and osmolality to match the vaginal microbiome.

Sliquid Sassy and Sliquid Sea

Sliquid Sassy has more plant cellulose for a slightly thicker, gel-like padding (than Sliquid’s original formula). Sliquid Sea has added seaweed extracts added for moisture, anti-inflammation, and antioxidant effects.

Good Clean Love Almost Naked

Good Clean Love lube relies on aloe vera for its slip factor and is (in my experience) more accessible in brick-and-mortar locations — not just sex shops but also health food stores. It is subtly flavored with vanilla and lemon.

Other Aloe-Based Lubes

If you want aloe vera lube that isn’t flavored at all, Aloe Cadabra is another one I’ve gotten along with. I’ve also cut open aloe leaves to use the gel as a vaginal lubricant. The downside of going the all-natural route is that you must use it up quickly or refrigerate it to stall microbial growth.

Hybrid Personal Lubricant

If you want juuuust a bit of silicone for more lubricity or to simulate cum, my favorites include the following.

Sliquid Silk

This product contains water, plant cellulose, silicone, and other ingredients to keep the formula consistent and sustain its shelf life. The recipe is relatively minimal for what it is.

Pussy Willow by Intimate Earth

Pussy Willow contains the ingredients listed above, and additionally, extracts of shiitake mushroom, licorice root, aloe leaf, and goji fruit for soothing, anti-inflammatory, and skin-softening properties.

Sensuva Erosense

Sensuva Erosense is made of similar stuff to Sliquid Silk but adds aloe vera and propanediol for a longer-lasting slip (more on that in a bit).

Flavored Lube

So you want to have some more fun with manual and oral sex but don’t want to deal with the messiness of whipped cream — or anything to do with sugar near the vagina!

Here are some flavored lubes that actually taste good for flavoring your fellatio and cunnilingus.

Sliquid Swirl

Again, Sliquid keeps its formula the most minimal and low-impact, so it’s my top pick if you’re sensitive down there — or if you plan on using it for vaginal intercourse.

My favorite Sliquid Swirl flavors are:

• Cherry Vanilla – 9/10 – In small amounts, I almost forget that it’s not meant to be candy
• Blackberry Fig – 8.5/10 – Also candy-like. The fruity flavor complements the base formula’s tartness as well
• Piña Colada – 8/10 – Delicious and kind of like Bath & Body Works’ Coco Verbena. There’s coconut candy taste with some acidity.
• Green Apple is pretty great, too, though it’s been a while since I’ve tried it.

Get Sliquid Swirl flavored lube here.

These flavored lubes contain aspartame, so just be aware of that if you’re not into artificial sweeteners, and take lightly my comparison to candy.

I’d totally avoid the Blackberry Fig, Blue Raspberry, and Tangerine Peach flavors. Not every aroma was meant to mix with Sliquid’s base lube formula!

Sutil Flavors

Sutil Flavors’ formula is akin to Sutil Luxe Body Glide — more gel-like, long-lasting, and dries down like lotion. It relies on stevia for sweetness and propanediol for slickness.

My favorite Sutil flavors are mint (not too sweet) and coconut (think piña colada). Their vanilla is also super sweet and has some bitter notes that remind me of maple syrup.

Exsens Mint Mojito Warming Intimate Massage Oil

This mint mojito rendition is one of the most fun lube flavors I’ve ever tried. It tastes like it says: a sweet lime beverage with a hint of mint.

There’s a slight warming sensation, fun for contrast by sighing vs. blowing air wherever you’ve rubbed this flavored lube. I highly recommend it for blowjobs. The downside is that it does contain glycerin, so I’d recommend keeping it external.

Water-Based vs. Silicone-Based vs. Oil-Based

I loooove water-based lube, but you might not. If you love your silicone toys, you might be in the same boat — but there are other reasons the best personal lubricant for me might not be for you, and vice versa.

Water-Based Lube Pros & Cons

Water-based lube tends to be the safest for intravaginal use and combining with condoms or toys. Notably, Sliquid and Good Clean Love lack propanediol, propylene glycol, and glycerin, making them osmotically balanced and less impactful on the vaginal epithelial cells.

The downside is that it doesn’t last as long as the others unless you reapply or lightly spritz it with water (warning: it can feel cold) to re-wet it. As such, there are certain situations where someone might use other formulas for different reasons.

Ingredients to Use With Caution

Although these lube ingredients are generally safe, it’s important to know when to use them and when not to use them.

Pure Silicone Lubricants

Liquid silicone may melt silicone dildo surfaces, but it’s great in other applications, such as partner intercourse or with hard material toys like glass and stainless steel. A little goes a long way! Another unique property of silicone lube is that it’s water-resistant — use it for steamy shower sex.

Silicone lubes I’ve tried and love include Überlube, pjur, and Sliquid Silver.

Oil-Based Lube Formulas

Oils degrade latex condoms and increase the likelihood of breakage. However, they’re great for their lubricant longevity and moisturizing properties. You might like oil-based lube (perhaps even straight-up coconut oil) if you’re mainly using it for handjobs, external rubbing, or bareback anal play.

Oils and butters can be paired with vaginal intercourse, but I’d err on the side of caution here. Also, maybe you’re not using latex barriers — there are other materials to explore, like polyurethane, lambskin, and nitrile, though they’re more expensive.

Plant-Based Propanediol

Propanediol does interact with the vaginal epithelial cells’ water balance, though it’s not as harsh as highly osmolar glycerin/glycerol. Propanediol can help water-based lube last longer, some formulas have a lower concentration of these ingredients than others, and a little goes a long way.

Small amounts of propanediol are okay in my book. Why? Some propanediol-based lubes have irritated me and some haven’t.

There’s also a good reason Sutil‘s formulas are so popular: along with lasting long and being suuuper slick, propanediol also feels like a luxe lotion when it dries down. I might use such a lube more liberally externally, especially if it’s flavored and I’m licking it off a partner, and less so internally.

As always, I trust you know your microbiome better than I do. Patch test first, observe your body’s reactions in use, and decide for yourself the pros and cons.

Arousal Gels & Balms

There’s a balance to strike: I want an arousal gel that makes a definitive difference without being overpowering. Since my vagina is quite sensitive, keeping a sensory balm primarily isolated to the clit is generally preferred, too.

Bijoux Indiscrets’ Slow Sex Clitoral Arousal Balm

This arousal balm from Bijoux Indiscrets contains L-arginine and ginseng for a warming effect, drawing more blood flow and attention to the area for enhanced sensitivity. Your mileage may vary, but I’ve found it gentle enough to rub between my labia for a subtly escalating heat

It also absorbs super quickly (read: won’t spread super far) and, as a bonus, tastes like coconuts

Morgasm Water-Based Arousal Gel With CBD

Morgasm also contains L-arginine, plus tingly mint to contrast with the warming effect, and of course, cannabidiol for relaxation and anti-inflammation.

I like Morgasm more as an external arousal gel — rub it against the clit and between the labia — than as an internal lube. It also has a subtle vanilla mint flavor, for those who are into that.

Use code SSC for 15% off Morgasm arousal gel.

Where to Get Condoms

I’m not on birth control, I fucking love deep penetration, and insemination is reserved for my fantasies only, so condoms are a must-have. My partner and I go through them quite quickly, so here are suggestions to keep the cost from adding up.

(I personally tend to stock up on the large variety pack if there’s no rush. If we’re in a pinch, we get the Trojan Magnum Ecstasy condoms.)

Save on Variety Packs

Prices on individual products and assortments vary, but in general, you can find condoms for cheap or at a bulk discount online. My favorites include:

Condomania

• Get variety or bulk packs. I tend to keep coming back to the larger condom size sampler.

Early to Bed

This shop carries a range of barriers, including condoms, dams, gloves, and finger cots.

• Trustex non-lubricated condoms – at about $0.45/condom, it’s a great deal if you’re using them with sex toys or already adding liberal amounts of your preferred lube anyway. Just add a drop in the tip for comfort and all over the outside.
• Variety pack – $5 for 8, about $0.63/condom

FYI, I do get a kickback from Early to Bed for your purchase, so if you happen to need condoms while you’re shopping for toys from them, I appreciate you using my links! Thank you.

Get Condoms for Free or Cheap Locally

The campus health center at my alma mater sold condoms for $0.50 each. I highly recommend asking what’s in stock if you’re still in school!

Free condoms are also available in all fifty states in the USA. Check this GoodRX directory for more info on free condoms mailed to you or available for pickup.

And again, actually ask about or see the selection available! Some locations have large condoms, dental dams, finger cots, and internal (“female”) condoms, for a wide range of users. In other words, don’t dismiss it just because it’s free. Some of the options are really nice.

More Penis Play Products

I love these thicker formulations for handjobs and blowjobs. Remember, though: balms and oils tend to be incompatible with condoms, so plan your play accordingly!

Wicked Sensual Massage Cream

This cream’s consistency is so dense — somewhere between lotion and shortening. It is the crème de la crème for a decadent full-body massage with a happy ending, especially the unscented formula. If you want to turn the experience into a more immersive spa session, there are two herbal scents: orange blossom patchouli and sage.

Bijoux Indiscrets Oral Sex Balm

It’s a super thick, plant-based lip balm for sliding and slight cooling sensations during oral sex. I immensely enjoy it for fellating, the way it balances gliding with drag between my lips and the glans of a penis.

A little goes a long way; I’ve been using the same tube for seemingly forever. Its consistency feels more luxurious than your run-of-the-mill lip balm.(Aquaphor will do just fine if you don’t care to splurge, though!)

Mouthwatering Spray & Mints

Lastly, if you’re prone to cotton mouth, the tartness of Bijoux Indiscrets’ citrusy Slow Sex Mouthwatering Spray and Flintts Mouthwatering Mints can quickly combat it!

CBD Carriers (Lube, Suppositories, and More!)

CBD’s anti-inflammatory effects, pain relief, and relaxation properties are well-documented. It’s no wonder that it’s a cult crowd-pleaser for topical use before or during sex — when staying present to the sensations is vital!

Water-Based CBD Lube

My favorite CBD lube is GoLove. Straight up.

Why I love GoLove CBD

Not only does it contain 2 mg of CBD per pump, but also, unlike most other CBD lubes, it’s water-based, making it compatible with toys and condoms. The deliciously emulsified formula is also pH-balanced, lacks the most common hyper-osmotic lube ingredients, and is friendlier to the vaginal microbiome.

Use code SUPERSMASH for 10% off GoLove CBD lube.

Morgasm CBD Arousal Gel

Indeed, other water-based CBD lubes exist, but GoLove is my favorite — even though it’s runnier.

Morgasm is thicker and will hold up better when, say, using CBD for relaxation during fisting or with big toys. Its L-arginine and menthol also make it a fantastic external arousal gel. However, Morgasm’s tingly mint extracts are intense for me internally.

Every body is different, and you might like Morgasm’s consistency. One delicious application of Morgasm to intensify sex is on both sides of a condom for fellatio.

Use code SSC for 15% off Morgasm CBD arousal gel.

Magick Shay Glow Skin Serum

Magick Shay’s CBD face serum contains CBD from certified organic Vermont-grown hemp flowers, along with herbal extracts like:

• Reishi mushroom – anti-inflammatory and antioxidant
• Rose petals and rose hips – hydrating, selective antimicrobial effects, anti-inflammatory, and antioxidant
• Chamomile flowers – soothing and anti-inflammatory
• Red clover flowers – accelerated wound healing and potentially increased collagen for anti-aging
• Marshmallow root – faster wound healing, anti-inflammatory, reduces skin irritation

What sold me on Magick Shay’s Glow Serum were the reviews from long-term users — after just one bottle, it wasn’t uncommon for their skin to be clear of acne even a year later. Why? One potential explanation is changes in the skin flora, making Glow Serum an especially great option for those managing folliculitis-based body acne.

I just call it magic for how it’s helped my skin chill out when salicylic acid alone wasn’t quite cutting it and I didn’t want to deal with benzoyl peroxide bleaching my clothes or sheets. If you know, you know.

Oil- and Silicone-Base CBD Lube & Beyond

The recurring descriptors I hear of Foria’s CBD products are “warmth,” “relaxation,” and “like a hug.” My favorite CBD products I’ve been sent to test are:

Booty Melts paired with Intimacy Sex Oil made preparation for anal sex substantially easier. My friend said he could discern the warmth spreading inside of him and how it took way less time to get a toy in. Once penetration started with a glass dildo, he had one of the most mind-melding, confetti-brained orgasms of his life.

Honeypot CBD Lube has a silicone base for long-lasting, water-resistant muscle relaxation and sensual soothing.

Relief Salve paired with Wellness Tonic — when I experimented with going off my antidepressant, Foria’s Wellness Tonic took the edge off (begone, cramping and ruminant rage!), and the Relief Salve felt like a natural, gentle heating pad.

Menstrual Cups

Speaking of periods, large menstrual cups are the bomb. They hold a tight seal, so there’s way less leakage than with a pad or tampon.

I have a heavy flow and high-set cervix, meaning that a menstrual cup would ideally:

1. Capture a loooooot of fluid.
2. Be easy to reach with my itty-bitty fingers, so I don’t have to ask my boyfriend for help fishing it out for me.

There are many factors in choosing the right menstrual cup for you (no, it’s not about “tightness” or “looseness”).

My personal favorite is Fun Factory’s Fun Cups in Size B. If I’m in a pinch and need something long-lasting at a storefront, Instead Softdiscs are my go-to.

Pheromone Perfumes

Pheromone perfumes for women tend to contain copulins, or a group of fatty acid chains secreted vaginally with the highest concentration right before ovulation. They’re speculated to signal impending fertility and make straight men go feral — boosting testosterone, increasing risk-taking and attention to you, and sexual and romantic desire.

There are other pheromones, which I’ll discuss more in another post, but synthetic copulins are among the most common for getting sexed up.

While it can be hard to pinpoint whether people’s flirtatious advances are in response to the fragrances, the pheromones, or just you (and your natural pheromones) — I think people have a good sense of scents that suit their body chemistry. We’ll focus on the carrier fragrances today.

Of course, a scent’s interaction with body chemistry is very personal, so use Fragrantica to compare the notes to other perfumes you’ve tried. Bear in mind that I’m by no means a fragrance geek; take my descriptions with a grain of salt.

TIP: Not sure whether pheromone perfume is for you? Try a sampler kit — Eye of Love has “Attract Him” and “Attract Her” sets.

Exsens Feminine Pheromone Sprays

Exsens’ body care products and pheromone mists are on the feminine side with Under the Influence and Angel’s Dream. These scents are made in southern France with a proprietary blend of synthetic copulins — veiled under the labels, “fragrance” and “parfum.”

As the names suggest, one is a bit more decadent, and the other more airy and floral.

Under the Influence Pheromone Mist

Under the Influence is a sultry nighttime fragrance — think of a teasing candlelit dinner date — with:

• Top notes of black currant and bergamot
• Heart notes of rose, lychee, and davana flower
• Base notes of patchouli and vanilla

Yes, it’s floral and fruity, but balanced by other equally important descriptors including warm, a tad woodsy, and minimally earthy, thanks to the patchouli’s presence.

The following scents may share some similarities:

• Parfum De Lune Magique by Parfums Genty
• L’Or de Say Celebration Orsay

I’ve used it quite often when going out, and my bottle is almost empty. Get Exsens’ Under the Influence Pheromone body spray.

Angel’s Dream Pheromone Mist

Arctic Rhodiola Rosea

Exsens also makes a more celestial and powdery daytime fragrance they call Angel’s Dream, containing:

• Top notes of bergamot, pineapple, and lily of the valley
• Heart notes of pear and plum
• Base notes of vanilla, musk, cedar, and amber

Sweet, white floral, warm, and again, powdery, also come to mind. I wasn’t super into Angel’s Dream, but both of Exsens’ scents cover up the synthetic copulin smell quite well.

Working With Copulins Yourself

I can definitely smell synthetic copulins when they’ve been added to aromas. Hint: they smell like straight-up ass cheese in their undiluted form, but they can (and arguably should) be mixed with fragrances.

If you want to combine pheromones into your perfume, try a copulin concentrate — as little as one drop in a perfume bottle is enough. The putative female pheromone mix contains: propanoic, methylpropanoic, butanoic, methylbutanoic, and methylpentanoic acids.

Don’t make the same mistake as me of using too much in some Bath and Body Works body spray when I was in school. A classmate straight up asked, “Do you know what that smell is? Something near us smells like ass.” Of course, I didn’t tell her it was my failed perfume experiment.

(I’ll discuss the compounds, dosing, and how to track “hits” or “successful” results another day.)

Eye of Love Pheromone Perfumes

Eye of Love covers a different range of pheromone formulations to “Attract Her,” “Attract Him,” and “Attract Them.” Their pheromone molecules include estratetraenol and androstenol and come in striking glass bottles.

Feel free to stack them with copulins mentioned above — while estratetraenol is more about the emotional draw of a woman, copulins are more sensual.

My personal favorite Eye of Love formulas are Morning Glow, unscented, and Matchmaker Red Diamond. Of course, my body chemistry is different from yours, so what works well with my sweat might not work well with yours. 🙂

Closing Thoughts

When I often write about the mechanics of sex toys, it’s easy to associate me with maximalism, moar, moar, moar, and more. My sex toy reviews are just one facet of my sexual experiences, though.

While toys can be involved when playing with a partner, the focus is on turning the experience into an immersive ritual for all the senses: tasting each other’s tongues, the smells and sighs, and our hands all over each other.

It’s about devoting time and space to our bodies. It’s tending to each other’s gardens and reaffirming the value of self-care and partner care. Take care of yourselves — because you all deserve it.