by Super Smash Cache · Published November 8, 2020 · Last modified May 22, 2025
A summary of my thoughts on the Icicles No. 70 in one word — no, sound — would be, "AAAAAAAAAAAA!" Not even a full-on word. Just unintelligible screaming, in the best way. I've often joked about the difficulty of staying…
by Super Smash Cache · Published November 6, 2020 · Last modified July 28, 2024
The Lora DiCarlo Baci is one of the most powerful clitoral air pulse massagers I've ever tried — and I've tried many over the years. They all work for me, but this one takes me into, "OMFG, I might…
by Super Smash Cache · Published November 5, 2020 · Last modified July 19, 2024
If you've ever wanted to fuck a cloud deity, that's what the SelfDelve Marshmallow dildo feels like. As the name suggests, the Marshmallow Sweet Treats Twisting Dildo is suuuuuuper soft, with a colorful rope design. Not only do the…
by Super Smash Cache · Published October 30, 2020 · Last modified July 5, 2023
If you follow many sex-positive Instagram pages, you've probably seen an influencer either posing with the Honey Play Box Jubilee or incorporating it into a meme. In-depth reviews rarely accompany the smiling selfies, so I'd like to shed some light…
by Super Smash Cache · Published October 25, 2020 · Last modified July 17, 2024
Stuck in a sex toy sea of pink, purple, and cadaver beige? Fuck that. Nix the gendered marketing and stroll through my sex toy collection: the lush dildo forest where teals, greens, and powder blues are abundant. We'll make it…
by Super Smash Cache · Published October 16, 2020 · Last modified September 18, 2023
Imagine you're masturbating and you're about to orgasm. At exactly the critical moment, the sound of a dolphin (or maybe angry squirrel) squeaks from your hole. Your dog downstairs hears it and has a barking fit at the mysterious noise.…
by Super Smash Cache · Published October 14, 2020 · Last modified December 2, 2025
For discreet masturbation, it's hard to top the Fun Factory Stronic pulsators' power-to-noise ratio. These thumping, miniature fucking machines are must-haves when traveling, Welcome Fun Factory's SUNDAZE; they call it a Pulse Vibe. I call it brilliantly capitalizing on…
by Super Smash Cache · Published October 12, 2020 · Last modified July 28, 2024
Looking for your G‑spot or A‑spot? Exploring your cervical fornices and deep spots? The 321 (Blast Off) and Seahorse acrylic dildos by Lovey Productions are perfect for that! They are exactly what my vagina needed when I was younger.…
by Super Smash Cache · Published October 8, 2020 · Last modified July 19, 2024
Meet Trinity, an ADORABLE cloud creature who loves hugging, dancing, and cave exploring. The Trinity vibrating dildo is one of three new sex toys from Cute Little Fuckers. Their line features out-of-this-world vibration creations for anybody. There's no hot…
by Super Smash Cache · Published October 6, 2020 · Last modified May 24, 2025
The We-Vibe Rave was the only G‑spot vibrator I would have re-bought if I had to restart my collection from nothing — even after owning over $10,000 of sex toys. G‑spot vibrators don't often do much for me, but this…
by Super Smash Cache · Published October 3, 2020 · Last modified March 11, 2024
"Svakom is what happens when you batter, over-salt, and deep-fry something that's supposed to be fancy." "Really?" I responded to my reviewer friend. "I thought of it as the reverse: cheap vibrators in nice packaging. That's a recurring problem…
by Super Smash Cache · Published October 1, 2020 · Last modified May 6, 2025
I'm waiting for the imminent Netflix original documentary about the Lora DiCarlo Osé. Nobody's announced any plans for such a feature, but I figure it's only a matter of time, given this robotic massager's notoriety. The backstory: Lora DiCarlo's…