3 of my first sex toys and better alternatives (includes noje G Slim & Silicone Willy's 8 inch review sampler)
"Health care gadgets," read the customs label when I ordered my first dildos. $16 for two, shipped from China, paid with a Visa gift card I loaded up because I was too young to have a credit card.
Imagine the mini-heart attack when my mom not only insisted on coming with me to pick up the parcel but also asked the post office clerk what was in it.
Luckily, he misread the sloppy handwriting and read aloud, "health care goods." I told my mom it was fancy vitamins and skin care because that would explain the contents' cylindrical shape.
It's been 8 years since I got my first two dildos. I was almost lucky enough to evade toxic jelly toys from the start, but I sure have come a long way since then! And I know to check for whether a shop ships sex toys discreetly.
These weren't all my first three sex toys ever, but they were pivotal to my sexuality.
- Generic mushroom-tipped glass dildo
- Blush Novelties Scarlet G
- Purple jelly dong
1Generic mushroom-tipped glass dildo: how I discovered cervical orgasms
This was the dildo that started it all. The "health care gadget." You might be wondering, "Why glass dildos for your first sex toy? Doesn't that hurt?"
For one, glass is a very affordable, body-safe material— perfect for health-conscious teen's budget. It's pretty hard to fuck up the body-safe quality of glass, even if you buy it super, super cheap. In contrast, shitty and porous products are often mislabeled as silicone, so I found cheap "silicone" harder to trust.
And no, the glass didn't hurt. At 1.5" wide, it was big for a first-timer, but the glass is slippery, and I found it more comfortable than the drag of silicone.
My favorite part was the mushroom-shaped tip. While I didn't know much about my G‑spot back then, I followed what made me feel good: thrusting the dildo all the way in, sliding behind my cervix.
I felt a combination of pleasurable pulsating and almost like I had blacked out for a split second, and I knew without a question that it was my first cervical orgasm.
What I'd recommend now: Icicles No. 53 or Chrystalino Champ
The Icicles No. 53 glass dildo is a good option. It's not exactly the same as the dildo I had, but its length, width, and head shape are a close match. And the texture is mild enough that I probably could have used it as my first toy.
If you want something smoother and flatter to more easily slide behind the cervix, consider a Chrystalino Champ instead.
I don't advocate going all-in with a dildo before trying a clitoral vibrator, but I was happy with using just fingers on my clit at the time, and that was the route I took.
2Blush Novelties Scarlet G: how I started appreciating vibrators clitorally
At age 19, I still had some weird AF hang-ups about my sexual response. Deep down, I believed that vibrators would desensitize my clitoris, and I avoided them externally.
I was, however, on a mission to squirt and okay with using a vibrator against my G‑spot. It sounds so illogical when looking back, but it demonstrates how much I believed that orgasms via penetration were superior.
Funny enough, neither of the toys that ended up making me squirt are G‑spot toys.
Frankly, the Scarlet G's shape frustrated me when I first tried it. I didn't understand that G‑spot toys don't necessarily do all of the work for you. Even if you already know where your G‑spot is, there's still a learning curve as you figure out the best way to aim a toy.
And, frustrated, I went ahead and used the vibrator externally anyway. I'd feel weird about it afterwards and worry about my sensitivity (which inevitably took my mind off of pleasure). And then I'd still use it on my clit! It eventually got to the point where I was like, "You know what? This feels great. And if I eventually get to the point where I need a vibrator to orgasm, so be it. I can always buy another one."
3 Fat purple jelly dong: how I discovered the sex bloggersphere
Luckily, I only used this toxic toy once before someone found it and threw it away. Basically, I had built up a HUGE following on FetLife at the time and started having subby internet guys buy me gifts. I felt weird asking for expensive toys, so I put a bunch of jelly things on my wish list.
Once it arrived, I (rightfully) didn't trust it. Well, it says "phthalate-free" on the package, so it should be fine, right? (Wrong. There's no label regulation.) Well, it doesn't make my tongue go numb or tingle when lick it, so it should be fine, right? Wrong.
I KNOW. That's advice that I've actually seen on the internet, and I think "does not immediately cause harm or concern" such a low standard. I wondered, "what the fuck even IS jelly?" and ended up finding 374598347594835 sex bloggers telling me the truth about toxic toys.
The truth is that even if something isn't immediately apparently wrong, porous toys harbor bacteria, yeast, and mildew over time. And if that wasn't gross enough, toxic toys leech oil and plastic softener. Yep.
What I'd recommend instead:
Ruse 18 Inch Double Dildo by Blush Novelties
The Blush Novelties Ruse 18 Inch Silicone Double Dildo is made of body-safe silicone, meaning it will last a lifetime with proper care. In contrast, jelly dildos grow mildew, fall melt, and fall apart, needing to be replaced far more often.
Though the Ruse 18-inch double dildo costs more than a jelly toy, it ends up costing less in the long run. Plus, the price is entirely fair for something that won't give you chemical burns.
I've tested four different silicone double dildos for vaginal DP and compared them!
Blush Silicone Willy's 8" Remote Control, or anything from the Silicone Willy's line
Blush Novelties has a whooole line of affordable, body-safe, representational dildos, including non-vibrating ones of different sizes for under $30! (As of the day I posted this review.)
The Silicone Willy's 8" Remote Control's cost is comparable to big "realistic" vibrating dildos on the market. Heck, it costs less than some of the TPE, TPR, and "Cyberskin" vibrators I've seen. But it's totally body-safe and will last way longer.
AND it's thick AF (1.75" diameter) to clench around intensely when I come, but with a forgiving outer layer. It's one of many affordable options from Blush for someone looking to level up in size. I was already pretty comfortable with penetration by the time I used sex toys, so this would have been fine for me.
The vibrations are pretty weak by my finicky standards, but you know what? For a BIG, realistic dildo, I'm okay with that. Even if you don't turn on the vibrations, $45 at the time of posting is still, in my opinion, a fair price for the Silicone Willy's 8", considering how girthy it is.
There are plenty of more average-sized, non-vibrating options to choose from, for those who are relatively new to penetration.
Hey, heads up!
Some of these products were sent to me in exchange for my honest and freely-given opinion. As well, I use affiliate links throughout this post. They bring me a commission at no extra cost to you and help keep this website running! You can find a huge selection of other body-safe toys at SheVibe.
My first toy was a cheap plastic vibe from a shop in the mall. I'm glad I had picked that one because at the time I didn't know of toxic toys and came close to getting some. It has served me well over the past few years and it has more of a pin point tip for the external stimulation. Kind of wish I had gotten the galaxy print version of it but that one was quite too big for me at the time. Still use the little guy to this day. ^^
I had to do a lot of research on toys to make sure I wasn’t getting anything toxic and getting the best one for myself. I got my first toy last year for my birthday; it was by California Exotic Novelties and called the Chic Wave. I loved it and recommend it to everyone!
My first toy was the picobong kaya rabbit vibe I got at a feminist sex shop (thankfully selling all body safe because I was only mildly aware about that at the time). a decent rabbit vibe but I didn't know about how many bloggers are wary about rabbits.
We bought our first sex toy from the Adam & Eve catalog over 25 years ago. It was a purple ABS plastic battery operated vibrator that broke in a few weeks. I'm not sure what the alternatives were back in the early 90s, but something like the We-Vibe Tango would've been better.
My first sex toy was a small anal butt plug that my wife controlled. Followed by the small silk for my first pegging. Need bigger for more intense feeling
First toy was a simple and inexpensive rabbit. It was travel size so that was a perk, but overall, it was an ok, decent beginner toy.
My first toy was a pair of handcuffs. They worked fine although I've since upgraded to a more durable pair.
First to picked was a Body Wand to use with my gf. Also picked up a glass dildo at the same time. Fantastic choices! Would do it over again
Aside from my children the greatest thing my ex husband ever did for me was buy me my vibrator. It was a rabbit and it opened my eyes to a whole new world of possibilities and put me in charge of my own satisfaction.
I can't remember which toy exactly was my first but I had quite a few toxic and unsafe sex toys. I really would have appreciated the kind of info that is accessible today when I was first picking out toys. Swapping out jelly for medical grade silicone is a huuuuuge upgrade!
My first toy was a silicone butterfly vibrator and I hated it soooo much. It was buzzy and I was not a fan
My first toy was a cheap plastic vibrator toy from Aliexpress. I didn't know if I would like sextoys and that's why I bought the cheapest I could find (which is bad, I know, by I didn't know a lot about sex toys back then). I didn't like it but after that I bought a standard silicone vibrator from a good website. It made such a difference. I like using vibrators now.
My first toy was a curved glass dildo with a series of beads gradually decreasing in size from one end to the other. It was a good first toy for experimenting with vaginal penetration and the sensation when rubbing it against my clit was really nice.
My first toy as a teenage male was a cheap rubbery vagina that I paid about $15 for in the backroom of a "flower shop". I don't necessarily regret it, but… I'm still holding out for one of those steel Njoy toys!
My first toy was a vibrating duck.…. I still have it somewhere, but I don’t use it anymore!
I sadly tried a lot of shitty toys before I learned better, but the one I did like, and keep, is the Orchid G (very similar to the Scarlet G). Even though the vibration quickly stopped working, I liked the shape, especially for using in the shower. I'm excited to see that you're recommending an affordable rechargeable version.
I bought two non-safe toys before I knew about material safety. One was a purple TPR dual-stim vibrator that came free with another purchase as an offer that Lovehoney was doing. I actually loved it, I loved the feel of the material and the shape and the vibrations. The other was a super realistic Doc J UR3 dildo. I only used it once because it was pretty big and I wanted to work up to it, but I eventually returned it because back then Lovehoney let you return stuff within a year of buying. As a substitute I bought the Truskyn Tru Ride which is the same mold and is dual-density silicone. But I continued to use the purple one with condoms, though there was a breakage incident once, maybe due to oils leaching? By the time I found out that condoms won’t necessarily protect from it, and by the time I got around to trying to return it, LH had changed their policy to only unused products (probably a good idea, but inconvenient for me). So it’s literally up in my closet (along with a silicone rabbit that I did not get along with).
Really like this, thank you for an another interesting read!