Uberrime Fascinus, Bound 2.0 XL, and Selene dildo review

We’re going MAGICALLY MAXIMALIST and FULL FRILLS with these Uberrime dildos.

• Fascinus, a huu­u­u­uge, winged cock inspired by ancient Roman amulets for pro­tec­tion from the evil eye
• Bound 2.0 XL, a hel­la veiny and rope-​besieged mem­ber — light on the CBT, heavy on the bulge, big­ger than my forearm
• Selene — illu­mi­nate your insides with intense rib­bing, chain tex­tures, and god­ly glit­ter — inspired by the Greek moon goddess

As always, expect mag­ic and mythos from Uberrime dil­dos — there’s cul­ture to the chaos. Let’s explore sex toy his­to­ry and the depths of Wikipedia together.

Uberrime Fascinus review: girthy winged dildo

The Uberrime Fascinus Large looks like a beast next to my hand, ready to pun­ish this pussy with its 2.2” diam­e­ter. Its metic­u­lous­ly feath­ered wings fold and flex for cli­toral cru­ra sur­round sound — or, if I want more pres­sure on the glans, I can slight­ly rotate the Fascinus to cen­ter just one wing.

Fittingly, the root word of “fasci­nus” is sim­i­lar to that of fas­ci­na­tion, orig­i­nal­ly mean­ing to cast a spell on or bewitch. Its dick­ma­tiz­ing folk­lore goes far deep­er than 7”.

40% of the world’s cul­tures believe in the evil eye — the super­nat­ur­al idea that oth­ers could cast curs­es on you via a malev­o­lent gaze. The ancient Greeks and Romans used phal­lic amulets to pro­tect from such mis­for­tune. Hence Wiktionary’s def­i­n­i­tions of “fascinum”:

• A charm, spell, witchcraft
• A phallus-​shaped amulet worn around the neck as a pre­ven­ta­tive against witchcraft
• A kind of seashell

I sure as hell need­ed to ele­vate my apotropa­ic defens­es, lead­ing me to two “obvi­ous” and “log­i­cal” conclusions:

1. I need more dil­dos in my life.
2. I should place them strate­gi­cal­ly around me as a “kind of light­ning con­duc­tor for good luck” — archae­ol­o­gist Ralph Merrifield’s words, not mine.

How the Uberrime Fascinus feels inside me

Dear lord, why is it so thick? There’s so much of it, yet my vagi­na wants more of the Uberrime Fascinus.

The glossy, swoop­ing head slides in eas­i­ly, all things con­sid­ered. After that, its mid-​shaft bulges out, then slooooow­ly tapers down, like a base­ball bat.

Here’s what these fea­tures mean for me while thrusting:

1. Stimulation from this dil­do is most­ly dis­tinct­ly cli­toral. The girthi­est part glides over the mouth of my vagi­na dur­ing each “out” stroke for a seri­ous stretch. It’s not fuck­ing around when pulling on and stim­u­lat­ing my inter­nal cli­toris. There’s a lot of exter­nal cli­toral stim­u­la­tion on the “in” stroke, too.

2. The thin part of the shaft bends eas­i­ly, allow­ing me to ori­ent the wings’ feath­er tips against my cli­toral glans and labia for added pres­sure. So yes, the dec­o­ra­tive details make a dif­fer­ence, as long as you can con­sume most of the insertable length. There’s also tons of tex­tur­ing at the bot­tom of the shaft. Same deal; use it to bump and grind against the clit with deep, slow slid­ing movements.

3. I can eas­i­ly grip the balls as a “han­dle” for extra lever­age when angling the Uberrime Fascinus.

4. My cervix appre­ci­ates how eas­i­ly the squishy, sloped tip slides into the pock­et behind it (the pos­te­ri­or fornix). However, quite a bit of the length is used for angling rather than inser­tion, so I wish there was more insertable length to ram hard­er, though. Your mileage may vary.

5. The veinage is pri­mar­i­ly visu­al. With the smooth and slip­pery sur­face, tex­tures on the shaft don’t feel like much, which may or may not be a good thing for you. I like it because it means I can go hard and fast, focus­ing on the pres­sure shifts more than any­thing else.

Uberrime Fascinus and Fascinos measurements

Maybe you like the Fascinus aes­thet­ic and want a divine pro­tec­tion dil­do but aren’t keen on the size. The winged ver­sion has a small­er, made-​to-​order size option, as well. 

Maybe you’d rather have the wing­less Fascinos, which is, as the prod­uct info page puts it, “based on an ancient stone phal­lus that was used as an indi­ca­tion that a broth­el was beyond the doors in which it was hung.” It’s a sleek­er, some­what stan­dard real­is­tic dil­do with three skin tones. 

	Fascinus only	Fascinus and Fascinos
Total length	6.5"	8.2"
Insertable length	5.0"	7.0"
Head diameter	1.4"	1.9"
Mid-shaft diameter	1.6"	2.2"

Who is the Uberrime Fascinus for or not for?

The Uberrime Fascinus is not for sex geeks who:

• Strongly pre­fer to go super, super deep
• Seek easy G‑spot angling; a firmer shaft and more front-​loaded head would bet­ter serve you in that department
• Need lots of inter­nal tex­ture; the sur­face is too smooth to do much along the walls

The Uberrime Fascinus is ide­al for dil­do fanat­ics who:

• Mainly seek sen­sa­tion at the bot­tom third of the vagina
• Enjoy coital align­ment tech­nique and slid­ing or bump­ing motions against the clit
• Relish the “out” stroke when thrust­ing just as much as the “in” stroke
• Looooove the beau­ti­ful mar­bling and intense detailing
• Just want a mythical-​looking dil­do with wings because HOW CUTE IS THAT?!

Get the Uberrime Fascinus and Fascinos

• Off-​the-​shelf Fascinus large
• Off-​the-​shelf Fascinos
• Custom-​made Fascinus
• Custom-​made Fascinos

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Uberrime Bound review: 2.0 XL rope bondage dildo

“That looks like two myth­i­cal beasts on either side of a cock that they’ve punished.”

— a friend see­ing my pho­to of the Fascinus, Bound 2.0 XL, and Selene

As the name sug­gests, the Uberrime Bound 2.0 is a re-​release of an old design. Its cock-​and-​ball torture-​inspired sil­hou­ette had been around since at least 2013 — before I start­ed my blog.

Fast-​forward 8 years. SheVibe owns the rights to the design, and they’ve passed it on to Uberrime to bring the cre­ation to life, “swollen and bulging with exot­ic pleasure!” 

How do I feel about the Uberrime 2.0 XL?

Not only is the Uberrime Bound XL girthy, but its forte is also in its cas­cad­ing con­tours. Each bump — between the spi­ral­ing strands — feels like the ten­sion of get­ting a cock head in for the first thrust, but on repeat.

I screamed into a pil­low, giv­ing my vocal cords per­mis­sion to pierce the air unfet­tered, thrust­ing as hard as I wanted. 

Of course, you can tip drill to savor tac­tile trac­tion. But chances are if you’re try­ing the XL size option, you chose ten inch­es of dil­do for a rea­son. As with many giant Uberrime Dildos, the tip is tapered and sloped on one side, mak­ing it easy to slip behind my cervix and bot­tom me out.

Uberrime Bound 2.0 vs. the original casting

“Detailed” is an under­state­ment with the Uberrime Bound 2.0.

Their sig­na­ture shim­mer illu­mi­nates every:

• Twist of the wind­ing rope, includ­ing knots at the frenu­lum and base
• Pore, vein, and skin wrin­kle on the shaft

Most of the skin creas­ing is just under the head, like a retract­ed fore­skin, but there’s also plen­ty fur­ther down where the rope digs into the sump­tu­ous­ly soft flesh. In con­trast, there’s min­i­mal tex­tur­ing at the sloped, glossy glans.

Bound rope-​themed dildo softness

That brings me to the, uh, rough his­to­ry between the orig­i­nal Tantus Bound and me. Amid the ridicu­lous Shore 40A-​ish firm­ness and mat­te sil­i­cone fin­ish, its vagi­nal rug­burn turned me off to tex­tures for years. I neat­ly boxed myself into the “faint of vagi­na” con­fines until around 2018.

Many sea­soned sex toy con­nois­seurs read­ing this raised their eye­brows at “Shore 40A.” That’s about how hard a pen­cil eras­er is — and on top of that, the Tantus Bound rendition’s sur­face was rugged.

Uberrime’s ver­sion is con­sid­er­ably smoother and soft­er, at Shore 0050 for the Bound 2.0 XL. It came up as 3A on my hard­ness durom­e­ter; think of sli­i­ight­ly stale gum­my can­dy. The reg­u­lar size Bound 2.0 is about a 6A, bal­anc­ing sta­bil­i­ty with comfort.

Uberrime Bound measurements

Here’s how the Uberrime Bound 2.0 vs. Bound 2.0 XL mea­sure­ments com­pare to each other:

	Bound 2.0	Bound 2.0 XL
Total length	6.7"	10.0"
Head diameter	1.5"	2.2"
Shaft diameter	1.3"	2.0"
Insertable length	6.0"	8.7"

Closing thoughts on the Uberrime Bound 2.0 XL

People have asked me, “Is [the Bound 2.0 XL] huge, or are you just tiny?” And my answer is both.

I seri­ous­ly don’t see any down­sides to it, as long as you’re its size roy­al­ty tar­get audience:

• The 8.75” insertable length sounds deli­cious to you
• You can han­dle a 2.2” diam­e­ter at the head and 2” all the way down
• You enjoy (tem­pered) tex­tures and some squish
• Deep, straight pen­e­tra­tion appeals to you
• You love invest­ing in fuck­able works of art — the Bound 2.0 is noth­ing short of that

Get the Uberrime Bound 2.0

• Bound 2.0
• Bound 2.0 XL

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Uberrime Selene review: moon goddess dildo

Helios, the sun god, was Uberrime’s first deity-​inspired dil­do design. Now meet the sis­ter of Helios, Selene — the moon goddess.

I imag­ine the Uberrime Selene as a cloaked fig­ure in chains. The duster swoops and drapes and is embossed with moon phas­es on the col­lar and “skirt.”

Even if you’re not per­son­i­fy­ing the Uberrime Selene, the atten­tion to detail is striking:

• The indi­vid­ual chain links are crisply defined.
• Even with the sharp ridges (i.e., “fab­ric” folds), the soft Shore 0050 sil­i­cone makes the tex­tures quite manageable.
• No few­er than sev­en styl­ized vul­vas are incor­po­rat­ed into the design.

My favorite way to use the Uberrime Selene is to turn it side­ways so that the promi­nences along the shaft press into my front wall upon inser­tion. Twisting is fun, but I still default to deep and hard thrust­ing. And feel­ing those apex­es glide again and again quick­ly makes me see stars.

For shal­low pen­e­tra­tion, its flex­i­bil­i­ty makes it easy to bend and grind the tex­tured shaft against the cli­toris. Most of the sen­sa­tion is in the low­er half of my vagi­na, even when the Uberrime Selene is insert­ed all the way.

Since it’s quite squishy and slim at the tip, then tapers out, it’s most intense at the bot­tom of the shaft. In oth­er words, if you pre­fer some­thing front-​loaded and unyield­ing, or deep cervix mas­sage is a must-​have, this dil­do isn’t for you.

I like the Uberrrime Selene, but it wouldn’t be a stand­alone toy for me. It would be part of a line­up with a longer and firmer dil­do, like the Aptus. Or, if I’m crav­ing the sharp edges, I think of the Uberrime Selene as a more ven­er­at­ed but dain­tier Tantus Tsunami.

Uberrime Selene measurements

• Length: 7.5”
• Head diam­e­ter: 1.43”
• Mid shaft diam­e­ter: 1.75”
• Base shaft diam­e­ter: 2.07”
• Insertable: 6” (approx­i­mate­ly)

Get the Uberrime Selene

• Off-​the-​shelf
• Custom-​made

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This post was spon­sored! Opinions expressed are my own.