Porn for Women: 6 Traits I Love Seeing!

Plenty of women watch porn.

And, when what women want is a core consideration (instead of an afterthought), we consume even more visual smut.

There’s a lot of nuance in what entails “porn for women.” After all, we all have unique sets of turn-​ons and turn-​offs; I can't speak for what half the pop­u­la­tion wants. Nor are these broad brush­es all-​encompassing of porn.

However, there are ways porn web­sites can put in the effort to make the user expe­ri­ence more invit­ing and more plea­sur­able to more women.

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1. Real orgasms, passion, and female pleasure

I don't want yet another porn website where female orgasms are often:

• non-​existent
• exis­tent but bla­tant­ly faked for the camera 
  • e.g., with unnec­es­sary hol­ler­ing at the slight­est touch
• a teeny-​tiny box lost in a sea of cat­e­gories cater­ing to the male gaze

If someone's good at fak­ing a con­vinc­ing orgasm, I can respect the hus­tle. What's prob­lem­at­ic, though, is when view­ers inter­nal­ize the (inac­cu­rate) nar­ra­tive that female orgasm always quick­ly occurs dur­ing a BJ-​jackhammer-​facial sequence.

Or worse, when they don't both­er to learn what makes peo­ple with vul­vas come. Porn is no sub­sti­tute for sex edu­ca­tion and should not be judged as such, but the media we con­sume influ­ences cul­tur­al assump­tions of nor­mal­cy. Doubly so when it comes to taboo top­ics that we keep hush-hush.

The truth is that, while female orgasms take some effort, they aren't com­pli­cat­ed — if you under­stand what penis­es and cli­torides have in com­mon.

In porn, just a few ways to center female pleasure and orgasms include:

• Incorporating more enthu­si­as­tic cun­nilin­gus and focused fingering
• Clitoral rub­bing or using toys dur­ing penetration
• Performers work­ing only with those they are gen­uine­ly attract­ed to

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2. Sexy men and sexy women

Speaking of attrac­tion, it's not exact­ly a rev­e­la­tion that women in porn are often cho­sen for their looks, while for cishet men, there tends to be tun­nel vision around penis size.

There's room for that (pun not intend­ed) in Bellesa Plus's "Big Cock" cat­e­go­ry. And there's room for women who would pre­fer perus­ing the "Hot Guys Fuck" chan­nel or "Hot Guys" cat­e­go­ry. (In Bellesa Plus's words, "The babeli­est of the babeliest.")

It's also not a mystery to me why androphilic women love queer porn

1. Men in gay porn are cho­sen for their looks; we often get to see more than one cute guy at once!
2. Woman-​on-​woman porn incor­po­rates more cun­nilin­gus, fin­ger­ing, and toys (includ­ing out­side of strap-​on play)

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3. A variety of steamy scenes, channels, and vibes

There's a com­mon mis­con­cep­tion that porn for women is artis­tic or sen­su­al­ly soft with lots of kiss­ing and eye con­tact. Some of it is, but that's a sliv­er of the selec­tion on Bellesa Plus's woman-​oriented stream­ing service.

There's plen­ty in their "Passionate," "Rough," "Bondage," and mul­ti­ple group sex cat­e­gories, too — to name a few.

Bellesa Plus calls itself the "Netflix of Porn." With over 50 pre­mi­um porn chan­nels and 3 video updates per day, it's not hard to see why. You get to sam­ple a lit­tle of every­thing from major studios.

Here's a peek at what you get with Bellesa Plus

• Bellesa Films and Bellesa House, direct­ed by Jacky St. James from the female gaze
• Over 600 erot­i­ca sto­ries, includ­ing audio porn
• Amateur porn and fea­tures with a gonzo feel
• And yes, some art­sy, "high-​end" flicks 
  • E.g., from SinfulXX, Scarlett Revell, and Lightsouthern

AVN and XBIZ award-​winning names you might recognize

• Performers: Asa Akira, Manuel Ferrara, Tori Black, Cindy Starfall, and more
• Mason/​Sam No (XEmpire porn net­work: HardX, LesbianX, EroticaX)
• Greg Lansky (Vixen, TUSHY & TUSHYRaw, Deeper)

All in all, Bellesa Plus isn't just soft smut for women. But they curate their col­lec­tion more close­ly to align with trends in what women want — for a more equi­table excursion.

That includes both the con­tent itself and the presentation.

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4. Diversity without fetishization of fat people, POC, or ages

Porn titles on tube sites are so LOUD AND SPECIFIC — and the mar­ket­ing tends to zoom in on any­thing that makes a female per­former "Other."

If she's a woman of col­or, she may be rel­e­gat­ed to the "Asian" or "Ebony" cat­e­gories and hard­ly fea­tured else­where. Titles fea­tur­ing petite women are con­flat­ed with "Teen" porn. And, in the words of my fel­low blog­ger, Submissive Feminist, "Fat women are unseen in videos that aren’t titled degrad­ing things like, 'PAWG (phat ass white girl) chub­by tit­ty fuck.'"

Race and body build aren't expe­ri­ences I can safe-​word out of. It's okay to have a "type" — but with how peo­ple who look like me are mar­ket­ed, main­stream porn sites often feel like I'm dragged into a kink or fetish that I nev­er con­sent­ed to. It's quite unwel­com­ing for women of col­or espe­cial­ly. (And yes, that applies to the per­form­ers, too.)

Bellesa Plus doesn't use fetishiz­ing lan­guage. They just let hot peo­ple be hot peo­ple in the thumb­nails. Women of col­or are sub­jects of joy and pleasure.

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5. Content warnings for potentially off-putting material

When I asked my female Instagram fol­low­ers, "What do you want to see less of in porn?" a recur­ring response was "gap­ing close-​ups." Those shots turn many women off — and a lot of women find them hot when done right.

As with any other polarizing kink, consent is critical.

I'd love to see porn web­sites with warn­ings and time­stamps for com­mon trig­gers or squicks — a bit like MPA rat­ings and IMDb "Parent" Guides, but for adults. (I put "Parent" in quotes because such an index is help­ful for any­one who wants to avoid cer­tain scenes.)

Or, tag the con­tent and let users fil­ter out what they don't want to see, e.g., ATM, Asian fetishiza­tion, and step-​sibling roleplay.

The following courtesies can coexist

• Don't yuck oth­ers' con­sen­su­al yums.
• Let peo­ple opt-​out at their discretion.

That brings me to my next point…

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6. Transparency about what happens behind the scenes

Watching porn isn't just about me — it's about the workers whose labor I'm consuming, too.

Consider the fol­low­ing ques­tions when look­ing for porn:

• Did they con­sent? Are expec­ta­tions and com­mu­ni­ca­tion clear? Can work­ers call "cut" dur­ing a scene?
• Is there diver­si­ty both in front of and behind the camera?
• Are the work­ers paid fairly?
• Are their health, com­fort, and plea­sure cru­cial to the work environment?
• Are women the sub­jects of pleasure?

Bellesa can say "yes" to all these ques­tions, and that's just a base­line for what makes eth­i­cal porn.

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Where do I personally stand?

I want to enjoy a wide range of high-​quality smut and pay for the per­form­ers' labor with­out:

• Constantly squint­ing through the male gaze
• Wading through racist or oth­er­wise fetishiz­ing descriptions
• Feeling self-​conscious about my body in general
• Seeing ads. Ever. No creepy ban­ners, pop-​ups, cross-​platform pro­mos, or brows­er hijack­ers that redi­rect all your Google searches

Bellesa Plus is just one place to con­sume eth­i­cal porn. Another fan­tas­tic way to sup­port the work­ers is to pay for their con­tent direct­ly, e.g., OnlyFans and ManyVids — espe­cial­ly if you want some­thing more specialized.

I want Bellesa and other smutty content creators to show that:

• Millennials and Gen Z can and do care about sex work­ers' rights
• You can mar­ket diver­si­ty and rep­re­sen­ta­tion with­out being out­dat­ed and gross
• "Porn for women" isn't just some obscure niche — there very much is demand for it

Yes, Bellesa Plus spon­sored this post — and, after I checked out their ser­vice, I stuck around for quite a while.