Funnze Clit Torture & Bondage Kit Review
What did I get myself into this time?
My nipples are super receptive to pleasure and pain — bite or twist them hard enough, and I’ll cum instantly. It’s that obvious.
Meanwhile, I’ve learned that clitoral torture — in the masochistic sense — isn’t for me.
And “I didn’t like it on my clit, but I liked it on my nipples” would be a sugar-coated cop-out if I were reviewing a vibrator. In the context of kink toys, though, I think that’s a legitimate selling point.
Funzze’s 10-piece clit torture kit contains some bondage basics and some not-so-basics:
- A 2‑in‑1 pinpoint vibrator and air pulse massager
- 2 twisting pumps
- A silicone ball gag
- A leather blindfold
- Labia spreader straps and clamps
- Two side-on clamps
- A forked mini flogger
If you’re new to sensation play, consider mixing pleasure and pain!
Let’s walk through what each component of this bondage kit is for, starting with the massager.
2-In-1 Pinpoint Clitoral Stimulator
Consider this toy the “lite” version of two heavy-hitting innovators:
- Zumio pioneered the most pinpoint of the pinpoint, funneling rumbly vibrations into the densest strength-to-surface ratio for sharp sensations, like the grazing of a fingernail.
- Womanizer made the original air pulse toy. It was once an exclusive luxury, but new additions to the line and competitors have turned the almost-no-contact clitoral massager concept into its own category.
Pinpoint Vibrations
While Funzze’s white-label version is not as sharp or strong as a Zumio, it’s still stroooong. The motor alone would be B‑tier if it were any other shape, but the narrow, hard ABS plastic tip takes the intensity to A‑tier for the price. Vibrations transfer well through the material.
My pinpoint princess of a clit climaxes quickly with it and even finds it a bit much if there’s direct friction. I generally stay over the hood for a reason. If you need next-level intensity, though, consider that it was actively challenging to try the original Zumio X past the 4th setting out of 8, and I’m grateful there have been other, more refined models since.
And yes, you can get Funzze’s pinpoint stimulator and air pulse massager as a standalone toy, so if you’re not into all the kinky extras, it’s great for those on a budget. It has 3 steady speeds and 4 patterns, all of which I find consistent enough to enjoy for edging.
Also, it’s splashproof—fine for use in the shower, but I wouldn’t recommend dipping it in water.
Air Pulses
The air pulse end is gentle, comparable to about 3.5 out of the Womanizer Premium 2’s 14 intensities. That might leave something to be desired if you need ample vroom.
On the flip side, the Funzze version has 7 speed settings for small increments — ideal for sensitive clits and enough to get the job done for me on the third option.
For the price, it’s a fine introduction to the air pulse category. Just know that there are plenty of more powerful options out there.
Specifications
PINPOINT END
- ABS plastic
- 0.2” maximum diameter
- 3 steady speeds, 4 patterns
- 2 silicone attachments included
- One 0.5” wide — and I find it useless
- One with sharper edges for a lighter touch but more focus
TL;DR Overall, this toy is decently rumbly for the price — and pinpoint enough for me to say the exploration kit is worth it as a small gift box.
AIR PULSE END
- Silicone nozzle
- 0.5” wide x 0.5” deep opening
- 7 steady speeds
- Goes up to a 3.5 out of 14 compared to the Womanizer Premium 2
TL;DR Gentle, suitable for those with sensitive clits (that includes me). I would not recommend this side to those who need substantial intensity — but that’s okay because there are plenty of other sensations in this box!
What Else Is Included?
And would I put it on my clit?
I almost started relisting the items one by one and labeling which ones I would or wouldn’t use for clitoral torture — before realizing it would be futile because I wouldn’t put anything else from this kit on my clit.
Here’s how I would suggest using them.
Try These on Your Nipples
Acrylic suckers/pumps
Twist the top until the piston is screwed down, place it against the skin to form a seal, then twist back the way it was before to move the piston up. Flick it if you wish.
“Labia spreader” clips
These are alligator-style clamps with PVC-covered tips, which I find a silly choice to advertise for use on the vulva because the material is porous. It would have been much more hygienic to use silicone. As nipple clamps, though, they’re adjustable thanks to the screws on the sides.
Beaded slide-on clamps
Pair them with some crotchless panties with faux pearls to match.
Everything Else
The ball gag
It's breathable and made from body-safe silicone, so I have no complaints! Keep drooling. It can be adjusted from 14” to 20”.
blindfold
This one has a Velcro-like closure strap and can wrap up to 25”. Use it to build up anticipation and heighten sensations when the receiving party doesn’t know what to expect.
The forked flogger
It's decidedly stingy, with about 6.5” long narrow tendrils. You certainly could use it on someone’s clit, inner thighs, or bum. Since it’s porous and made of polyurethane leather, be mindful of potential fluid transfer. Consider using it over pants if you’re spanking someone’s clit.
Closing Thoughts
While some items in the kit may not be suitable for clitoral play, they can be used in other ways to enhance your erotic experiences.
The 2‑in‑1 pinpoint stimulator and air pulse massager is the star of the show, with its densely packed vibration sensation — but the clamps, pumps, and bondage gear amplify the sensory play possibilities for about the same price as dinner out for 2.
This post was sponsored! The writing and opinions expressed here are my own.
PLEASURE PRINCESS. COMPACT, HIGH-CAPACITY HUMAN. CERVIX SORCERESS.
I've tested over 350 sex toys and love diving deep for cervical orgasms, A‑spot stimulation, and kinky odysseys into the subconscious.
Mesmerizing mindfucking or physical fisting? Blowing men or minds? Opening books or legs? Why not all of the above?
Read more about me, my philosophy, and my love for cervical orgasms and deep penetration.
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Hello Cy! Have you ever tried the Uberrime Maxime? Felicity from Phallophilereviews says on her page that it's the best dual density dildo she's tried for g spot pressure, but I'm still not so sure about it. I haven't been able to find any other reviews of the new versions, so I was wondering if I could have your input. Thank you!
I haven't tried that one, but am inclined to agree with her based on the shape and my experiences with other thick Uberrime toys. I could look into getting one for a review?
That would be lovely! Thank you!