Uberrime Damn Alien Review: Beaded G-Spot Massager

“Why wear one string [of pearls] when you can wear two?”

– Coco Chanel

As my pussy wrapped the plethora of pearls, I couldn’t help but wonder: have I been enraptured by a benevolent alien or a behind-bars body mod proponent? Either way, Uberrime’s Damn Alien got me glazy-eyed and blushing with its beaded head.

With each glossy row that juts out against me, I clench in delight. They’re spaced out just right for slow, sensual savoring.

Uberrime Damn Alien Measurements

• Total length: 6”
• Insertable length: 5”
• Head diameter: 1.35”
• Max shaft diameter: 1.43”
• Min shaft diameter: 1.23”
• Ridge placements are most prominent at 1”, 2”, 2.75”, and 4.25” from the tip.
• Base diameters: 3.75” x 3.5”
• Your choice of flat base or bullet cavity: 2.8” x 2.38”

Love the Damn Alien’s triple-ripple shape but want to go bigger, deeper, harder against your A-spot and ceiling? Check out Uberrime’s Big Damn Alien, Night King, or Pris Toys’ Syren.

Otherwise, read on for G-spotty, clit-grinding goodness.

How Uberrime’s Damn Alien Felt in Use

Three rows of nodes line the top half — forget the spinning bead rabbit! The Damn Alien’s spheroids slide in synchrony on my front wall:

• One row rubbing my internal clitoris as I thrust and twist the flared corona against my G-spot.
• Another pair on my pussy’s tightest portion — pearls enrobe the shallowest quarter of my vagina again and again
• A final stretch at the opening, sometimes grinding on the glans (external portion) of the clitoris
• There’s maybe another inch of smooth landscape, then two bumps off to the side, beckoning me to corkscrew them in my cunt

With each glossy row that juts out against me, I reflexively clench in delight. They’re spaced out just right for slow, sensual savoring — nothing too hardcore.

Which Silicone Density/Firmness I Prefer

Two of the Damn Alien’s silicone softnesses include:

• Shore 0050 – squishier, flexing for clitoral alignment technique, tapping and sliding the externals on the way in
• Shore 8A density – firmer for optimizing the pearls’ penetration sensation. My favorite use for it was tilting the base way back — and the head way forward for more pressure on my G-spot

Both versions are pliable due to their moderate size. The design was, after all, initially called the Average Alien by Damn Average — realistic (by human standards) with an insertable length of 5” and diameter of 1.4”. I prefer the denser edition, which yields more resistance to wrap around.

And there’s something here for lovers of large and average aliens — because I did double vaginal penetration with my Damn Aliens.

Double Penetration With Alien Dildos

The stretch was enough to drive me crazy and woozy-faced, with slick secretions dripping down their surfaces. It wasn’t long before I came — craving dirty talk while super suggestibly subspace-y and ready for (play) abduction.

So much room was taken up inside me; my cave’s depths crushed the cocks together while their outer bases splayed apart. The Damn Alien‘s lowest row fervently pushed back against my front wall. Even a decorative bump on the bottom happened to line up with my swollen clit when I shifted ever-so-slightly to the side.

Closing Thoughts on Uberrime’s Damn Alien

I wanted a Damn Average Alien as far back as 2014. The small batches always sold out so quickly, and for a good reason: the Damn Alien is G-spotty AF and supreme for tip drilling! I sigh and squeeze my pussy just thinking about the Damn Alien’s knobs and notches again — rocking my clit inside and outside.

The stretch was enough to drive me crazy and woozy-faced, with slick secretions dripping down their surfaces … ready for (play) abduction… lowest row fervently pushed against my front wall.

Customize your Uberrime Damn Alien and add marbling. Shown here are glitter black with UV pink and UV green.

Footnote:

1. Nowadays, Sheep from Damn Average is working with Uberrime! It’s lovely to see some fan faves collaborating. Find Damn Average’s silicone squishies on Etsy.

Related posts:

• Uberrime BIG Damn Alien dildo review
• Browse my past Uberrime dildo reviews
  • Xenuphora is another average-sized fantasy dildo!
• Other alien-themed and glowing dildos I love:
  • NS Firefly Glass G-Spot Wand
  • Bob the Alien from Boutique Voila
  • Uberrime Alien Probe Thing
• Unique sex toys for the collector who has everything

Of course, you could get any Uberrime dildo customized in a UV glow or glow-in-the-dark color scheme. 🙂 I can’t say it enough: I fucking love the Uberrime Night King and Aptus!

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This review was sponsored. The opinions expressed and written here are my own!