Dee's Big Daddies: Dante, Duke, Danny huge dildo reviews

More adven­tures of a com­pact, high-​capacity human with a Mary Poppins purse pussy.

Pornhub's titles and Nars’ make­up names con­jure sim­i­lar reac­tions in my mind: “Dude, chill! Why are you so loud and specific?!”

Dee's Big Daddies saw the absur­di­ty of call­ing blush swatch­es Orgasm, Orgasm X, Deep Throat, and Gina. I imag­ine the last one is pro­nounced with a long “I” sound, like “[va]gina.”

Meet Dee's Big Daddies: huge “realistic” silicone artisan dildos

The mak­ers, Dee and Dolores, fol­lowed suit — in a tongue-​in-​cheek way with their colos­sal, platinum-​cure sil­i­cone dil­dos from the Milk District of Orlando. The mak­ers' “About” page reads, “Everyone either gasps or gig­gles when look­ing at big dil­dos, so we want­ed to have a bit of fun with that.” And have fun they did.

I can't decide what's more com­i­cal: their pho­tos of dil­dos next to soda cans or how they look in Dolores's dain­ty hands. She may be even more petite than me, but I nev­er con­firmed that. Nevertheless, I don't let soda cans be soda can'ts.

Vanilla, Caramel, and Chocolate can step aside. Make room for the likes of Creampie, Fellatio, Booty Call Blue, and Peg Me Pink.

The names and swatch names are light­heart­ed, but the qual­i­ty, size, and heft are seri­ous — along with the ser­vice and atten­tion to detail.

Customization options

Ordering direct from Dee's Big Daddies gives you so many ways to choose your adven­ture. Where do I even begin? In addi­tion to each dif­fer­ent dong shape, you get to choose among:

• FIVE skin tones and plen­ty of non-​realistic col­ors — a range not quite com­mon in the toy industry!
• FIVE sizes — four of them are for gigan­tic dil­do lovers, and there's a "Dee's Wee Daddies” size that's aver­age in some mod­els and slight­ly below aver­age in others
• Shore 0030 or 0050 sil­i­cone den­si­ty — basi­cal­ly, do you want your dil­do super soft like warm gum­my can­dy, or kinda-​sorta soft like cool gum­my candy?
• Vac-​U-​Lock or not — decide whether you want a hole in the base to attach to a fuck­ing machine, suc­tion cup attach­ment, or slot in a 0.8” wide bul­let (Blush Novelties’ Realm, Addiction, and Wellness Power bul­lets fit well)

These huge sil­i­cone dil­dos are hand­made to order in body-​safe, platinum-​cure sil­i­cone and specs of your choice! "You get the toy, but the soda can is mine,” reads the bot­tom of the prod­uct pages.

Which of Dee's Big Daddies I tried

Below are the exact Big Daddy makes and mod­els in my tester gift box. ("I knew you'd pick the Dante!" Dee texted me. She's famil­iar with my work and knows I have a type: long, lean, and pack­ing heat.)

• Dante - XL size, Shore 0030 den­si­ty, Shade A (Creampie) skin tone dil­do with Vac-​U-​Lock port 
  • AKA the longboi
• Duke - L size, Shore 0050 den­si­ty, Shade C (Orgasm) skin tone dil­do with a flat base 
  • AKA the rel­a­tive­ly rugged wild­card — it was a sur­prise pack­age in the package
• Danny — XXL size, Shore 0030 den­si­ty, Peg Me Pink dil­do with Vac-​U-​Lock port 
  • AKA the gar­gan­tu­an uncut one thick­er than my ankle

Here's how they per­formed inside of me. We'll ramp up from the long lim­ber one to the THIQUE DIQUEs.

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Dante XL curved dildo

XL size, Shore 0030 density, Shade A (Creampie) skin tone dildo with Vac-U-Lock

I love a long dil­do with a curved shaft and swoop­ing, squishy tip to slip behind my cervix. That's my tick­et to par­adise and a seem­ing­ly sim­ple answer to, "What is love?"

It reminds me of one of my first real­is­tic dil­dos, the lux­u­ri­ous­ly meaty VixSkin Johnny — but big­ger, of course. Dee's Daddies are also dis­tinct in appear­ance; the Creampie pearl pig­ment show­cas­es the vas­cu­la­ture beautifully.

And the Shore 0030 sil­i­cone makes it feel remark­ably meaty, squish­ing in my hands delightfully.

And yeah, the XL ver­sion is with­in the realm of a real human penis size, but only bare­ly. While I wouldn't call the dimen­sions or the sur­face res­o­lu­tion “real­is­tic,” there's plen­ty of atten­tion to detail:

• A retract­ed fore­skin sulcus
• A beau­ti­ful frenulum
• Hella cor­pus spon­gio­sum down the underside

Dee's Big Daddies Dante XL measurements

Here's how the Big Dante Daddy XL dil­do mea­sures up:

• Height: 9.5"
• Insertable length: 7.5"
• Head cir­cum­fer­ence: 5.5" (about 1.75 “diam­e­ter)
• Middle shaft cir­cum­fer­ence: 5.63" (about 1.79 “diam­e­ter)
• Shaft cir­cum­fer­ence near base: 6.63" (about 2.11 “diam­e­ter)

How the Dante XL dildo looks and feels in use

That pipeline's bulge can spot­light how soft the sil­i­cone is. It con­forms to my pos­te­ri­or fornix well, and the length is juu­u­u­ust right. My vagi­na wants to con­sume every­thing the Dee's Big Daddies Dante XL can give.

Think less knock­ing on the door, more tap­ping on the ceil­ing, and the "I can have anoth­er orgasm, and anoth­er, and anoth­er…" loop. Repeat until dazed and star­ing at the ceil­ing, think­ing, "What decade is it? How long have I been gone from this planet?"

Did I pant with my tongue stick­ing out while tex­ting a friend, “Once again seek­ing con­sent to send some audio of me moan­ing”? Yes. Did anoth­er friend ask, “How the hell did all that fit inside you?” Also yes. My height is about 14% vagi­na, after all.

Shore 0030 or Shore 0050? Vac-​U-​Lock or not?

There were indeed pros and cons to the squish­able Shore 0030 soft­ness. Let's start with the mild, mild downsides:

• I hard­ly (if at all) feel the cur­va­ture in use; my walls straight­en it out
• The Vac-​U-​Lock hol­lowed bot­tom shaft lacks sta­bil­i­ty if I don't have a bul­let slot­ted in. That can mean yield­ing to unin­ten­tion­al ejec­tion when I orgasm dur­ing vig­or­ous thrusting

“Are you sur­prised that hap­pened?” I asked my part­ner, who watched Dee's Big Daddy Dante dis­ap­pear inside me and get pushed out at the crit­i­cal moment. He replied, “Not at all.”

It's not a huge deal if you either:

• Mostly use short thrusts
• Love to accessorize

However, I'd say to get the Vac-​U-​Lock hole only if at least one of the fol­low­ing fea­tures is a must-​have for you:

• Full-​sized fuck­ing machine compatibility
• Strap-​on conversion
• Having a huge vibrat­ing dildo

What else makes the Big Daddy Dante XL so great

As a trade-​off for the slight draw­back of the Shore 0030 sil­i­cone soft­ness, there's a huge ben­e­fit: a vari­ant of the coital align­ment tech­nique. Simultaneously bend­ing the shaft to bash my cervix and grind against my cli­toris is divin­i­ty deployed.

I would usu­al­ly say that this slow slid­ing tech­nique isn't for every­one, but the phallus's flex­i­bil­i­ty makes it so that, even with a clit-​vag gap wider than mine, you might still get to grind on the exter­nals. And that is a sig­nif­i­cant perk of get­ting the soft­er sil­i­cone Big Daddy Dante.

Hooohhhhhh boi. I'm glad I tried some­thing bare­ly out­side my usu­al “type” of toy — famil­iar with a twist. My pussy clenched again just think­ing about it.

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Duke Large THICC dildo

L size, Shore 0050 density, Shade C (Orgasm) skin tone dildo with a flat base

Dee's Big Daddy Duke is basi­cal­ly what I wish the Squarepegtoys Nathan 1X would have been. Consider it a cre­ative con­ver­sa­tion with the oth­er maker's Nathan mod­el — but loud­er. In my head, the Duke is an imag­ined, ide­al­ized Nathan 3X.

What do I mean by that, and how does Dee's Big Daddy Duke feel in use? The Large Duke…

• Isn't exact­ly short, but still stout in shape and proportion
• Has a sub­tle head
• Somewhat press­es into my cervix, thanks to the length
• Has a dip­ping, sub­tle base­ball bat-​like swell that clings to my G‑spot.
  • Super fun to clench around!
  • Rotate it slight­ly while thrust­ing and twist­ing to feel it in action.
• Gives waaaaay more of a stretch

How Dee's Big Daddy Duke dildo feels in use

The rush of even the first thrusts makes my face flushed and woozy. Praise Dee's Duke Large's girth, firm­ness, and shaft shape. It makes me want to blud­geon my insides and love every sec­ond of it.

My cav­ernous cunt is no pas­sive par­tic­i­pant, though; it grips back at the bulge press­ing against my front wall. Even repo­si­tion­ing the dil­do after an orgasm is in itself orgas­mic. With a lit­tle tap-​tap-​tap, my toes twitch in no time. Don't just push in the Big Daddy Duke; also clench and pull in small, angled, rock­ing strokes along the G‑spot for max­i­mum effect.

And cum. And clench. And rock. And cum. And clench. And rock. And cum.

Dee's Big Daddies Duke Large measurements

• Height: 7.75"
• Insertable length: 6.75"
• Head cir­cum­fer­ence: 6.5" (about 2.07” diameter)
• Middle shaft cir­cum­fer­ence: 7.5" (about 2.39” diameter)
• Shaft cir­cum­fer­ence near base: 7.38" (about 2.35” diameter)
• O‑Ring size: 2.5"

It's juu­u­ust under the width of a soda can and feels bet­ter than liq­uid can­dy tastes. You'll want to keep a bev­er­age at hand to hydrate, though.

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Big Daddy Danny XXL huge uncut dildo bigger than a soda can

XXL size, Shore 0030 density, Peg Me Pink dildo with Vac-​U-​Lock port

Unlike the oth­er toys men­tioned in this post, the XXL Big Daddy Danny shows no mer­cy. It demands, “Cum for me,” and you will cum — if you can get it in, anyway.

The Dee's Big Daddies Danny XXL is thick­er than my ankle; pho­tos of this humon­gous dil­do beside a soda can for size com­par­i­son are self-explanatory.

It's fat, blunt, bold, and uncut. The first thrust gets my eyes glazed, my brows fur­rowed, and my teeth bared in a mind­less half-​smile. If a part­ner were with me, they'd prob­a­bly ask, "Are you ready?" before shov­ing a pil­low in my face to muf­fle the screams.

Even with the soft­ness, there's only a lit­tle yield­ing. Yet, the Big Daddy Danny in Peg Me Pink will stretch you out in style; the pink pearl fin­ish looks pret­ty AF.

Big Daddy Danny XXL measurements

• Height: 9"
• Insertable length: 7.5"
• Head cir­cum­fer­ence: 7.25" (2.31” diameter)
• Middle shaft cir­cum­fer­ence: 8.25" (2.63” diameter)
• Base of the shaft cir­cum­fer­ence: 7.63" (2.43” diameter)

The force exert­ed in all direc­tions pulls my cli­toral glans down for easy inter­nal and exter­nal pres­sure. Your mileage may vary.

Danny XXL by Dee's Big Daddies isn't for every­one, but chances are, if you lev­eled up your capac­i­ty to take a huge dil­do, you already know what your cave craves.

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Further reading about other extra-large dildos

• Mega-​Guide to Fisting and Huge Dildos
• 4 Commandments for Size Queens
• Uberrime Anurian thi­i­i­i­ic­c­c­cc fan­ta­sy dil­do review
• Tantus Bishop, Fist Trainer, and Pawn dil­do review
• Vixen Creations VixSkin Gambler review
• Hankey's Toys Topher Michels review

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Dee’s Big Daddies spon­sored this post! Get your sil­ly but some­what scary arti­san schlangalangs shipped from the Milk District of Orlando. <3