Selfdelve Veggie Dildo Reviews: Eggplant, Curved Cucumber, Fly Agaric Mushroom, and Pepper

There's no short­age of phal­lic fruits and veg­eta­bles. Perhaps the most obvi­ous exam­ple is ubiq­ui­tous recog­ni­tion of the euphemistic egg­plant emoji.

Unfortunately, the gro­cery store isn't the best place to buy hygien­ic inserta­bles. Produce is porous and hous­es microbes from the soil where it grows. There's only so much that wash­ing a cucum­ber can do to remove germs!

That's where SelfDelve's veg­gildos come in. They're cast in sil­i­cone— many from molds of actu­al fruits and veg­gies. And thanks to their mate­r­i­al, you can boil and bleach to dis­in­fect them.

The result is all of the nov­el­ty and vibrant col­or with none of the wor­ry. Here are my thoughts on a few of SelfDelve's unique dil­do and plug designs.

Selfdelve Fly Agaric / Amanita Muscaria Mushroom

You can wear this slen­der Amanita muscaria-​themed dil­do as a plug, but I don't think that does jus­tice to the sub­tle textures:

• the raised white dots
• the cap/"corona"
• the defined ring on the stem

At 5" long and 1.1" max-​width, the SelfDelve Fly Agaric is a match for those who want tac­tile stim­u­la­tion rather than deep pressure.

My vagi­na is insa­tiable when it comes to size and prefers smooth sur­faces, but my butt is the total oppo­site. And for that, the Fly Agaric Butt Plug is perfect!

The anal open­ing is dense­ly packed with Meissner's cor­pus­cles, or fine touch recep­tors, mak­ing it even more respon­sive to the silicone's landscape.

As such, this mushroom's dots offer just the right amount of stim­u­la­tion for me: dis­cernible, but not so defined that they're irri­tat­ing. If you like sharp­er tex­tures, you also enjoy the sub­tle "pop" from the coro­na and ring edges.

Either way, I find that small thrusts max­i­mize this dildo's impact. The SelfDelve Fly Agaric is on the dain­ty side, but I don't see it as lack­ing. It's a fun next step up from a first plug or dil­do.

Selfdelve Pepper Dildo

The SelfDelve Pepper's tri­an­gu­lar body is uncon­ven­tion­al in a dil­do but deli­cious­ly girthy (2" wide!) and twistable. It's smooth and glossy, stim­u­lat­ing with its big and bold edges. If you enjoy:

• fin­gers swivel­ing back-​and-​forth inside you
• a nice stretch
• ample pres­sure with lit­tle friction

…then you'll love twist­ing this dil­do against your front wall.

Despite its 8" length, I much pre­fer using the SelfDelve Pepper for the shal­low­er parts of my vagi­na. The pointy tip evades my cervix, fit­ting in front of or behind it with­out mas­sag­ing it. I pre­fer to thrust some­thing more bul­bous to fill my deep­er eroge­nous zones.

There's no curve or pro­trud­ing head, so this dil­do isn't going to hook behind the pubic bone; don't expect that kind of G‑spot stim­u­la­tion. But if your inter­nal cli­toris and ure­thral sponge are pleas­ant­ly sen­si­tive on the pubic bone, like mine, the SelfDelve Pepper might be for you.

Selfdelve Curved Cucumber Dildo

Okay, the SelfDelve Curved Cucumber dil­do is one of my new favorites! The curvi­er end is deli­cious­ly G‑spotty, while the shaft is flex­i­ble, allow­ing for deep­er front wall stimulation.

It's super easy to aim, whether I want the curve to point for­ward and away from my cervix, or pressed up against my cervix to mas­sage it. And if I still don't want as steep of a curve, that's okay— I can use the oth­er, rel­a­tive­ly straight end.

The 1.6" girth is above aver­age with­out slid­ing into Size Royalty ter­ri­to­ry. And the 10.6" length is anoth­er fea­ture that allows for intu­itive maneu­ver­ing. When one end is insert­ed, the oth­er can be used as a handle.

Whichever inter­nal hot spot I want to charm, the Curved Cucumber can get it. The oth­er veg­gildos on this list are spe­cial­ists, and the Curved Cucumber is the all-​arounder. I have noth­ing neg­a­tive to say about this dildo.

The Curved Cucumber is also (sub­jec­tive­ly) the pret­ti­est of the four. SelfDelve's veg­gildos are all ther­mochromic, mean­ing that they change col­ors with heat. But the Curved Cucumber also has pearles­cent shim­mer mixed in, empha­siz­ing the sub­tle tex­tures. It's a feast for the senses.

Selfdelve Eggplant Dildo

The SelfDelve Eggplant is one of the fat­test dil­dos I own, with a max­i­mum girth of 2.4". It's a blunt inser­tion and not for the faint of vagi­na. The shaft doesn't have much of a curve or bulb; instead, there's a grad­ual swell.

But it melts my front wall into an array of heart-​eyes emo­jis. The rea­son lies in the sil­i­cone den­si­ty. As men­tioned in my SelfDelve Eggplant review:

It's squishy enough to con­form to my pubic bone's dip and tes­sel­late against my G‑spot, while fat and firm enough to give my G‑spot intense resistance.

And for deep pen­e­tra­tion? My A‑spot and cervix are pleased. It's not often that I love a dil­do for both G‑spot stim­u­la­tion and deep pen­e­tra­tion, but the SelfDelve Eggplant ticks all the boxes.

Once it's in, there's no escap­ing the pres­sure and the bulging for­ward tilt. Perfect for when I'm crav­ing some­thing excep­tion­al­ly thick, and more mas­sive than the Vixen Randy, but just a bit less intense than the VixSkin Gambler. Many users will find this dil­do too girthy for deep pen­e­tra­tion. For me, that's not a con­cern, since my A‑spot is a bit shal­low­er than my cervix.

I orig­i­nal­ly want­ed an egg­plant dil­do just to have an egg­plant dil­do. However, I ulti­mate­ly enjoyed the SelfDelve Eggplant's inten­si­ty far more than I thought I would. I couldn't have asked for a bet­ter bal­ance of stretch and sil­i­cone squish. Read my full SelfDelve Eggplant /​ Aubergine review here.

Wrapping It Up!

SelfDelve's vegetable dildos go beyond being visually silly and fun— their shapes are functional and thoughtfully designed. They work.

The diver­si­ty in SelfDelve's col­lec­tion reflects not only the beau­ti­ful vari­a­tion in plants but also in how dif­fer­ent our pref­er­ences can be. I like how there's a lit­tle some­thing for almost everyone:

• Spotty Fly Agaric mush­rooms on the small side
• Smooth egg­plants on the oppo­site end of the spectrum
• Curved cucum­bers and bananas
• Asparagus and corn on the cob for the tex­ture sluts

…and so many oth­ers. Check out Spectrum Boutique's full selec­tion of SelfDelve sil­i­cone sex toys.

Further read­ing: Violently Patriotic America-​Themed Sex Toys

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[This arti­cle is a repost with some edits. I orig­i­nal­ly wrote it for Spectrum Journal.]