by Super Smash Cache · Published April 13, 2023 · Last modified November 29, 2024
More adventures of a compact, high-capacity human with a Mary Poppins purse pussy. Pornhub's titles and Nars’ makeup names conjure similar reactions in my mind: “Dude, chill! Why are you…
by Super Smash Cache · Published February 14, 2023 · Last modified July 17, 2024
Because self-love is about so much more than sex toys. On Valentine's Day of 2023, I continued my "tradition" of giving away an everlasting rose, courtesy of Spectrum Boutique — and…
by Super Smash Cache · Published January 28, 2023 · Last modified April 3, 2024
I've tried over 350 sex toys, and yet, I still find wonder in Toyland. So many visuals can be made phallic if you're creative enough. And with the evolution of…
by Super Smash Cache · Published November 22, 2022 · Last modified July 17, 2024
Meet The Thruster's younger sibling, La Boutique Voila. While Velvet Thrusters focus on luxury handheld fucking machines, Voila is all about the silly shapes and kooky contraptions, from aliens to…
by Super Smash Cache · Published August 10, 2022 · Last modified August 5, 2024
Fun Factory makes stellar vibrators and pulsators, but I’ve cum more on some than others. To celebrate their 26th birthday, let’s take a walk down memory lane. Here are the…
by Super Smash Cache · Published July 28, 2022 · Last modified November 11, 2024
Is it a drool-inducing, ecstatic experience, or is it merely passable as meat? The art of silicone dildo firmness is like cooking a steak — tenderness can make or break…
by Super Smash Cache · Published May 20, 2022 · Last modified July 27, 2023
I only use Facebook for three things nowadays: event pages, Weirdly Specific Playlists, and the "Oh wow, that is VIOLENTLY American" meme tag group. That last vibe was what I…
by Super Smash Cache · Published May 1, 2022 · Last modified May 21, 2024
Two alliterative words sum up these three dildos: Midwest ‘murrikah. What could be more Midwest than corn and moonshine? And what could be more tongue-in-cheek American than dildos shaped like…
by Super Smash Cache · Published March 10, 2022 · Last modified October 9, 2024
Friends don’t let friends buy sketchy sex toys from Wish. And friends don’t let friends rely on fabricated sex toy reviews where the writer hasn’t actually fucked the toy. My sex…
by Super Smash Cache · Published March 9, 2022 · Last modified July 19, 2024
My vagina is made of the same material as Mary Poppins’ purse. My vagina is made of the same material as Mary Poppins’ purse. A soda can fits inside. Yet,…
by Super Smash Cache · Published January 28, 2022 · Last modified July 19, 2024
Glass dildos look stunning and deliver some of the most intense stimulation — often with a fantastic orgasm-to-price ratio. The key is to find one that’s the right shape for…
by Super Smash Cache · Published January 18, 2022 · Last modified July 28, 2024
“It is efficient at extracting orgasms, yes.” “That sounds about right for a German-made sex toy.” It’s hard to overemphasize Womanizer’s influence in the sex toy industry. Their eponymous clitoral air…