Latest posts on Super Smash Cache

BMS Factory Naked Addiction vibrating and spinning silicone dildo

Most of the BMS Naked Addiction Vibrating & Rotating Dildo‘s features are remarkably average. Not least, its name is akin to store brand white bread. It’s only available in “Vanilla” color. And it measures just under 6 inches insertable length and 1.5″ diameter at its widest. If I were in a brick-and-mortar sex shop, I...

Mini review sampler: Womanizer Liberty, Satisfyer Partner Multifun 1, and Satisfyer Pro 3 Vibration

Mini reviews: Womanizer Liberty, Satisfyer Partner Multifun, Pro 3 Vibration

By the time I’ve finished typing this post, Womanizer and Satisfyer will probably have released ten new products. I can’t keep up, so here’s a fast blast of 3 new-ish clit toys from these companies. Jump to a section: Womanizer Liberty Satisfyer Partner Multifun 1 Satisfyer Pro 3 Vibration Womanizer Liberty: a miniature, travel-friendly clitoral...

Uberrime Aqua King silicone fantasy dildo review featured image banner

Uberrime Aqua-King Aquaman-themed silicone fantasy dildo

Ever wanted to cry immediately after a cathartic orgasm? Because that’s how the Uberrime Aqua-King makes me feel. And not necessarily crying during an intense orgasm, or feeling depressed afterward. I mean on a visceral level thinking, “Ah yes, I am still an earthly being.” Even merely pulling out the Aqua-King‘s triple-crowned head is a...

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Zalo Marie Rococo-themed G-spot vibrator review

Everything about Zalo’s vibrators and their Versailles-inspired presentation embodies “extra.” Not least, the Zalo Marie‘s ornate box almost looks like there should be paintings of happy cherubs all over it. Inside the box, the vibrator itself gleams with its intricate handle and 24K gold-plated pendant. Let’s be real about why I pounced at the Zalo Marie,...

My favorite sex toys, kinks, and "fuck yeah"s of February 2019

February 2019 monthly faves, oddly specific kinks, and “fuck yeah!”s

The best gifts you can give yourself when newly single are: 1. time, 2. self-awareness, and 3. fun. Getting re-acquainted with your less-explored kinks is a huge part of that. Find out what made me say “Oops, that’s my kink, but also, EXCUSE YOU?” this month. (And also, what made my best friend say, “I...

Uberrime Deep Diver glow-in-the-dark silicone tentacle dildo review featured image banner

Uberrime Deep Diver glow-in-the-dark silicone tentacle dildo review

The Uberrime Deep Diver is déjà vu for the seasoned sex geek, paying homage to the memory of Whipspider’s Tentacle. Their commonalities include a steep C-curve, suckers arranged at a slight twist along the shaft, and a wicked taper. Oh, and yes, they are both glow-in-the-dark dildos. To some, the Deep Diver’s girth near the base...

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Magic Wand Plus review: rumbly corded wand vibrator / Hitachi upgrade by Vibratex

[Background collage by @carlupanddye] The Magic Wand Plus is the first external wand-style vibrator I love. I could tell from the moment I turned it on and heard the motor’s gloriously low purr that it was meant to be. As the youngins would say, I stan it. I have only one whole complaint about the...

Emojibator Chickie clitoral suction vibrator review featured image banner

Emojibator Chickie review: chick emoji clitoral suction vibrator

I’ve heard of isolated incidents of clitoral suction toys making users bleed. The rumors sounded distant, like urban legends or stats that I’d never personally encounter. It wasn’t until I tried the Emojibator Chickie that shit got too real. My cervix paid tribute for my review of the vag-shocking Impulse Intimate E-stim Wand. And with...

Some of the best toys and sex accessories for partner play / Valentines Day favorites banner super smash cache

My top 10 sex toys & products for partner play

Sex toys are for people from all walks of life— not just single ciswomen this Valentine’s Day. And practically any sex toy can be a couples’ toy if you use it with a partner. Some toys, though, are more convenient to combine with certain partnered activities than others. These are my top picks, from a...

California Exotics Impulse Intimate E-stim / Electrostimulation G-spot wand review

Cal Exotics Impulse intimate electrostimulation / e-stim vibrator review

“Hey, I want your thoughts on this vibrator’s safety warnings list,” I messaged a friend. “I don’t know where this is going, but it’s already my favorite part of the day,” he responded. You see, the Cal Exotics Impulse Intimate E-stimulation Wand is a G-spot vibrator with zinc alloy plates that shock the user’s vagina....

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3 reasons why I want more body piercings in 2019

New year’s resolutions should be fun! The more high-spirited you are about them, the more likely you are to get them done. Fortunately, the process of modifying one’s appearance can be just as fun as showing off the results afterward, and piercings are no exception. Setting aside a time and place for relaxation Some people...

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Dame Products Pom review: quiet & low-pitched clitoral vibrator

The Dame Pom comes in jade green and looks like a flattened marshmallow Peep. How could I say no? Though it doesn’t feel marshmallow-soft like my Iroha Zen Matcha, it’s bendy to nestle effortlessly atop the external pubic bone. Plus, the Pom’s vibrations have a similar (but more powerful) low-pitched, rumbly quality. The shape of the...